A few weeks previous, I had a discussion with two dear friends of mine, about what makes us look at life the way we do. For me, the greater part of what influences my life is my religion, and the second part resides in the sadness and trials of life. If you ask me what my favorite books, music, or movies are, I would most likely give you a detailed list of things that are- to a worldly standard: sad. I sometimes mock and call myself a "walking oxymoron" because (I hope I can say this) I am generally a happy person. Yet, I love sad things. Not to be mistaken with loving the sad thing, or loving that the sad thing happens- I love the symbolism, the values, the test of faith, the wisdom, and the richness that I learn and feel from the life of another. It allows me to learn and to remember their sacrifice as I come to find my place within this world.
I stumbled across this quote by Franz Kafka back last May that at least for me illustrates why I am drawn to such things.
"I think we ought to read only the kind of books that wound and stab us...We need the books that affect us like a disaster, that grieve us deeply, like the death of someone we loved more than ourselves, like being banished into forests far from everyone...A book must be the axe for the frozen sea inside ourselves."
My favorite topics to learn about are WW1, human trafficking, human rights violations, genocides, global wars, revolutions, and WW2. However I am still unable to face things like the Holocaust. I am not sure if I will ever be able to. There isn't much I can take on that topic. The Boy in the Stripe Pajamas, and Night by Elie Wiesel are two things I can't face. I believe that these experiences of any topic don't have to be for everyone. Each of us are evoked by something that inspires to change and to live for something. For one person I know, they are driven by music and the expression and emotions, both the joy and the deep gloom it can impact. For another, they are driven by the happy things in life, and the force behind laughter. We don't all have to bury ourselves in the valley of sorrow like Kafka said to break open our frozen desires inside us. All we need to do is to surround ourselves with the things that evoke our spirits, and trust in the guiding force behind us to take us where we need to go.
Poppies- my favorite flower and in honor of WW1 |
What officially brought this train of thought to my mind was a movie that I just finished about a WW1 fiction story. Really, who lets me watch WW1 movies right before bedtime on a Saturday night? The buckets of tears flowed. I should be banned.